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creation story

Nov. 29th, 2010 | 11:39 pm
location: bedroom
mood: coldcold
music: none

This is a creation story I wrote in my first year of education for a world religions course.  It had been a week of -40 weather and I wanted to write something positive about winter so that I could stop diliking it so much.  The assignment was to write a story about the genesis of wind that was memorable and believable.  It remains my favorite assignment after 4 years at the university.

Do not worry my children.  Your father has been painted in the heavens to join the great dance in the northern sky.  Do not cry over his passing.  His spirit lingers and listens.  Yes, the same winter wind that beats against our tipi took his life but he would not want you to be frightened.  Come, let me tell you and your father's spirit a story, a story about the world a long time ago, before there was wind and when the whole world was covered in ice snow.  A time when the sky had no colour and winter reigned year round...

The People suffered and starved because Gaia was frozen and all the animals the People used for food and clothing had frozen.  While all this went on the Gods hid under a great lake called Sverdrup and were deaf to The People's prayers and cries.

Now, this lake, oh my children, was the biggest that there ever was or ever will be.  it stretched beyond the horizons and The People could not, with their strongest men and fastest canoe, paddle from one shore to the other.  the surface was as shiny as the smoothest river rock and when looking in its depths all you could see was your reflection.  And this, oh my children, was as the Gods wanted it.  For the Gods had a secret hidden underneath the still surface of Sverdrup.

Underneath the lake was hidden a garden of eternal summer where every sort of pland and animal lived and prospered.  Rain clouds raced over this garden propelled by wind, for wind is what changes the weather, of course, and brings the life giving rain clouds.  the Gods were happy with this place that was perfect in ever way and were content to keep it for themselves until the end of time.

But there was a woman.  A woman named Enigana who, in spite of the famine, was incredibly beautiful.  She was very odd though adn could not stand to have a speck of dust on her or on her clothing.  Enigana spent almost all her time on the edge of the lake washing her self in the warm water.  The water was kept warm, oh my children, because of summers heat rising from the garden encased by the unfathomable lake, of course.  This defilement of their waters made the Gods angry and they decided to send someone to punish her for her lack of respect.

It was to the Trickster that the job of Eniganas punishment fell, for he was the only one willing to leave the comfort of the garden for the bitter cold of the upper world.  He climbed, hand over hand, up the robe made of basswood fibres that kept the lake tied down to Gaia, until his face broke the surface of the water.  Eingana was there like usual but when the Trickster saw her bathing, he fell in love, of course.  And seeing how hunger was hurting her and her people, he decided to give her the greatest gift of all... the gift of summer.  The Trickster took the form of a handsome young warrior and spoke to Enigana, giving her the tools to bring summer and food to her land.

Now, my children, Enigana was not blind and she had seen hime rise out of the water.  She knew he was a God and to listen to his instructions very carefully.  So, as he had told her to, she prepared herself a hide of wasna to eat on her upcoming journey and made a small canoe ready for travel.  Before packing the canoe she placed a sprig of juniper that he had given her at either end of it to ensure safe travel.  She then used sage smoke and sweet grass to bless her vehicle before departure.  under her seat she carefully placed the rest of the magical herbs the Trickster had given her and she set out to find the midddle of the great lake.

As she left the shore, the Trickster took a great breath and blew, pushing the boat faster than she could paddle.  It carried her to the exact center of Sverdrup where no person had ever been before.  As the Trickster had warned her, the other Gods were now aware of what she was trying to do and began to boil the water around her.  So, quickly, she took out her tiny bundle of herbs and sprinkled dried yerba santa in a circle around her canoe.  Thus, she was protected.  She knew she would have to work quickly though because her small magic would not last long against the full fury of the Gods.  So with fingers working like a weasel escaping a trap, Enigana took out lavender flowers and burned them, thus, the Gods fell into a deep sleep.  then came the scariest part for Eingana, my children, for if it did not work she would die.  Placing the last of the herbs, and the branches of incese cedar in a pile about the size of a bull bison's heart in the middle of the canoe, she set it alight and created a bridge between heaven and earth.  Quick as a fox, Enigana put her rib bone knife between her teeth and jumped into the water.  She found the rope holding down the lake and chopped through its slimy siney-like cords in one swift movement.

"Swoosh" the water began to fall upwards pulled along by the cedar smoke to the heavens and it painted the white sky blue.  The Gods awoke to the sound of the lakes movement and it was as loud as a hundred waerfalls drenching 600 wailing women and 48 packs of howling wolves.  They were angry that Enigana had taken their garden away from them, for it was at this moment spreading summer and game across the entire world and could never be contained again.  They were furious at the Trickster for helping her, only understanding why he had done such a thing after they watched to two embrace in the gumbo of lake bottom.

The Gods, who had watched the Trickster blow Enigana across the lake, now knew exactly what to do to punish them for their misdeeds.  They said to Enigana,

"Since you were willing to risk all for summer and now know warm breezes and soft sunshine, we will turn you into a fawn and you will be South Wind.  you are now forever tied to summer and will carry it with you wherever you go and bring life to the People."

Then they turned to the Trickster and said,

"Since you were willing to risk all and venture out into winter and you now know hte bitter, harsh, deadliness of winter we will turn you into a bear and you will be North Wind.  You are now tied to winter and will carry it with you wherever you go and will bring death to the People."

Then, the Gods placed them up in the sky.  Now, my children, this was the worst thing they could have done to the lovers, for summer and winter cannot exist in teh same place and the same time.  So, now you know that when Winter Wind howls he is only trying to be reunited with his love.  We cannot be mad at him for that, now can we?

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Mar. 26th, 2009 | 12:05 pm

Okay, just a clarification on that last entry.  I am not quitting calculus.  That would be stupid.  When I said I was giving up on the things that cause me stress I was specifically referring to giving up on my mistaken belief that my grade in calculus somehow had bearing on my worth as a person and on my ability to be happy.  I continue to work at it and study, just as hard as before I just don't care about the grade anymore.

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Ah ha ha. I win

Mar. 25th, 2009 | 08:26 pm
location: Basement
mood: amusedamused
music: Clarinet on CBC radio 2

We all come across things in our lives that seem insurmountable; impossible; beyond our reach.  What do we do when our best efforts are foiled?  How do we continue if the job still isn't done and our grip on hope is tenuous at best?  Do we soldier on, even when success is smoke between our fingers?  We can neither see it nor feel it, only smell its tang that holds the promise of fire, lingering somewhere, waiting.  What do we do?Read more...Collapse )</div>

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Feb. 3rd, 2009 | 11:17 am
location: School Library
mood: hopefulhopeful

Well, I must say that this semester seems to be going swimmingly.  Of course now that I have admitted this a wrench will have to be thrown into the mix somewhere.  :D  I really love all my courses which is a bit of a problem because they continue to tempt me into academia and out of other, more practical professions. 

the obsession continuesCollapse )       

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Organizing the week

Jan. 5th, 2008 | 02:45 pm
location: the dungeon called my basement

Okay, so to keep myself from floundering and drowning in the exorbitant amount of work that gets dumped on my plate I make a list of everything I have to/should do that week and prioritize.  (Helps me get started, you know?)  Anyway, I figure this is as good a place as any to take the chaos that is university and put it down into a personally less intimidating format.  This way, not only do I feel obliged to stick with schedules I make because it's public, but my family can actually know what I'm up to.  :D

Soooooo, first the initial list of this weeks activities. 
- do questions and notes on Chapter 7 ~ French
- notes and reading, chapter 7 ~ Psychology
- buy Anthropology and Education text books
- Read required pages ~ World Religions
- Download, read, and make notes on Kottak, "Rituals at McDonalds" ~ Anthropology
- Write creations story ~ World Religions
- Go to library to pick up texts on "wind" ~ World Religions
- Start learning journal ~ Education Today
- Read Chapter 1 ~ Ed. Today
- Read Chapter 1 & 2 ~ Anthropology
- Visit Emma twice
- Wash the hardwood

Okay, now the organization.

**Disclaimer:  Schedule given below is apt to change without warning due to unexpected curveballs.  Life is to be taken in stride as this schedule is to be taken as a guideline. **

Saturday night - Do I give up? or will I try and do something tonight? 
                           - read chapter 7 psychology

Sunday - get out of bed at a decent time, say... 8:00
               - wash the floors
               - Do French questions ~ futur et futur anterieur

Monday - Physio with Emma
               - Buy required text books
               - Start writing creation story

Tuesday - do french reading ~ le conditional
                - start learning journal
                - Download Kottak
                - Read W.R. text

Wednesday - French questions ~ le conditional
                       - Physio with Emma
                       - take out books on wind?
                       - re-read W.R. text before test?

Thursday - do reading in Anthro and Education
                  - start making notes for chapter 7 psychology
                  - finish creation story - first draft

Friday - do any more readings for Ed.
            - re-read Kottak article and make notes

Saturday - go to class
                - take things in stride
                - go visit Emma?

Well, not exactly thrilling, I know, but this is my life.  I'm going to try and squeeze working on my new painting in here somewhere and I'll try and get together with Malorie and Dylan to see how their holidays went.  Somehow, I'm not sure how many of my usuall afternoon naps I'll be taking this week. 

Okay, I have a game plan.  I can do this.  Stay focused Bonnie.

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Jan. 4th, 2008 | 09:17 pm
location: my dungeon
mood: peacefulpeaceful
music: golden silence

    Well, this is my first entry.  Somehow, now that I have moved out of my old life and into my university career, I find myself in need of an outlet.  Previously, I had my incredibly verbose family with whom I could talk out loud with when life got just a little too complicated for me.  I'm an "a haut voix" type of thinker.  I'm getting better at thinking things through in my head but I occasionally need an actual physical outlet.  Otherwise the thoughts slip away like vapour. 

    So I'm done my first semester at the U of W and I came out the other side feeling alright.  I think I did a bang up job as I've recieved an A+, A, and an A- so far and am still waiting on the French grade.  Not bad for a newb, I figure.  First semester was tonnes of fun.  I made a few friends, stayed in touch with a few old friends, had fun in my courses, and had a social life.  Sure, some things were tough to get used to but I don't think I had to make any life changing decisions other than the one to become a Zen practioner.  Okay, so the zen thing has been pretty life changing, but SCHOOL wasn't difficult.  I knew what I wanted to do,had some focus, right?

Wrong!!  I don't know how I am going to survive this semester.  Two, no wait, three jobs, a full course load, classes every day of the week except Sunday, courses with more assignments and homework, AND I really don't know if I want to stay in the education program.  My work, I can handle.  Doing physio with my great-grandmother Emma fits in nicely with my school schedule and housecleaning for my Uncle and my Grandparents is pretty flexible.  The pay for both of jobs is great too.  I think I could even handle the full course load as there is more than enough time to get all the assignments done as long as you don't procrastinate.  Right now, the only two things that are really trying for me are the fact that I only get one day off classes a week and that I'm torn over dropping out of the education program.

So, going to school 6 days a week; fun ,eh?  It's amazing how much the weekend helps us keep our sanity and makes us feel as if there is some peace and quiet in our lives.  Or, maybe not peace and quiet.  Maybe it just plain helps us feel as if we have a life; a life of our own.  I don't know... I mean, it's only for one semester, right?  Just 4 months.  12 long marathon like weeks until I get a break.  Well, I get reading week in February to have a life.  He he.  I managed not to do any homework on weekends last semester, so that means that I can get all my school work done during the week just fine and that I don't need the weekend to do projects or anything.  That's good.  So, getting school work done isn't a problem.  A social life?  Well, I don't have much of one anyway and there is always Saturday night if manage my homework correctly.  I can have friends and a social life, so this too is not a problem.  Even if I dropped Education Today I would still be going to school 6 days a week so I think this is just one of those things I'll have to suck up and push through.  School will keep things structured and make sure I get out of bed too, so maybe I'll end up having more of a life because of my schedule. 

Now... the education program.  Today was my first class of "Education Today".  The professor was really nice but she started the class off by telling us all the reasons not to become a teacher.  Your administration won't support you, your clients(the students) won't want to be there and won't care about what you are trying to teach them, parents will be super critical and abusive, you'll deal with violence, 15% of your pay will go to buying supplies for your classroom, after you factor in the 60 hour weeks will only be making 15 dollars an hour, and, to top it all off, when you finally get to those oh so wonderful vacations that turn other people green with envy, you will be so burnt out and sick that you won't even get to enjoy them.  You will just be recovering.  Is this really the profession I want to get into?  Am I thick or something?  I mean, really, who signs up for this crap.  Oh, wait, that would be ME!  Honestly. *Bonnie indulges in a long drawn out, heart felt, sigh.* * and another one* 

I guess, it's just that education has been what I have been building my dreams, my hopes, my plans, and my life around for so long that to let it go really scares me.  What do I have if not education?  If I let that go am I going to be able to find a job that I like?  Education is what I know.  It's in my blood.  Why must I fear the unknown such?  Sure, I like psychology and I could get a masters in it.  But I don't know the work that comes after that kind of degree.  Sure, I know what the profession is called and what that career theoretically entails but I don't know the pros and the cons.  I don't know the ins, the outs, and what of the preconcieved notions surrounding ced certain profession are true and what are poppycock.  With teaching, I know all this crap, and yes it's crap... but crap I am familliar with.  Why must people always cling to the crap they know best?  Why not try and break away from the cycle of crap and find something that isn't crappy... find something amazing?  I think I know why I cling.  It's because there is a risk I won't find something amazing and that I'll end up wading in a kind of waste product I am not familliar with and am afraid that I won't know how to swim in it.  At least when you know the bad in something, you can size it up and say, "Yeah, I can deal with that".  I guess, now, my biggest problem is that I'm looking at teaching and at its baggage and saying, "No, I don't think I can swim in that.  I can't survive in that kind of pool." 

Change.  What a very scary word that is.


*Bonnie feels slightly better.  She feels that she now knows a little bit more about what is bothering her and why, that she can manage this semester, and that she should stay in Education Today because she needs the credit and it should be a GPA booster*

Sorry I didn't re-read this.  I'm sure there are a million spelling errors but a girls gotta go to bed you know.  It's Saturday tomorrow, I've got school.  :D

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